It's taken me a year to write this. I guess because half of me couldn't believe that I'd done it, and the rest of me took that long to recover. A year ago to almost the summer solstice day, myself, my husband and a band of rowdy rebels (aka fellow parents at my kids' school)…
Author: 40 for 40
Same red goo
I understand that I do not understand. I know how it feels to feel worthless, my skirt lifted without consent. I have had a gun pointed in my face by police officers thanks to a driver's DUI. I have felt afraid walking alone in the dark whilst the drunks have circled. I have been humiliated,…
The other big C
Here is something I never dreamed of seeing ahead of turning 40. For that matter, an enigma I never imagined in my life time. It makes skydiving look like I was utterly rude and taking the piss. This is the stuff only nightmares and apocalyptic Hollywood is good for. It's the new big C that…
38
And just like that I am 38. An entire year after an initial winter hiatus on blogging, here I sit, musing, as my youngest daughter approaches school in September, we celebrate living in Kent for the last six years, not to mention ten years of marriage up next and all that that time passing evokes.…
Starman
I had a Physics teacher in my first year at secondary school whose class you could sneak out of when he turned to face the blackboard. He took an extraordinarily long time to say anything. And he rarely showed any emotion, except the occasion when some unfortunate sod dropped a magnet into the iron filings.…
The tunnel
Who would have thought that a bit of running could be so profoundly all-consuming? Training three times a week since October, for 30 minute to four hour runs, when dawn was cracking, between school pick ups, after work and through rainy, sleet ridden and some time snowy weekends. There I plodded. Incessantly. And now I…
Thirty six candles
Ugh.. What is up with birthdays? How come they bum me out so much? I swear they didn't used to fill me with dread. I am certain I enjoyed them when I was little. All the fuss, the glitter, the cake and the presents. Or did I imagine the joy? I do certainly vividly recall…
Resolutions
You may not believe this. Friends certainly haven't when I have used the term to describe myself. In my mind, though my eyes though it works perfectly and completely sums me up. I am the ultimate "extroverted introvert". Whilst appearing amiable on the outside I am not, contrary to popular belief, overtly sociable, and if…
Grown up
Isn't it funny how you picture yourself a certain age? When you imagine doing something new, when you reminisce, when you think about the future. In all these scenarios I am the same age. Stuck and static. Do you find this? I look in the mirror and I see all the lines and the dark…
Stoned
I like a date night as much as the next (wo)man, but I also quite enjoy ordering in a Chinese and watching the latest box set episode. Binge in every sense of the word. Yes, I’d love to go out with my husband every weekend if I could, but mostly it’s too darn expensive and tiring…
40 for 40 